DUNNO IF YOU HEARD but I’m not going to You-Know-Who tonight even though my parents and their friends are. *laughs hysterically* I just heard four of his songs via a few phone calls..I thought it would be horrible YOU DO NOT HANG UP on Sir Paul McCartney and so I answered the phone(s).Strangely, very very strangely, the one and only thing that calmed me down all day and actually made me happy was the voice of Macca singing All My Loving from 156 miles away. Even if my mom ruined it slightly by texting “Brilliant” after the call. Not even putting in punctuation. REALLY, I mean REALLYYYY LIKE?!? But it was odd, because it wasn’t even bittersweet hearing that voice, and although I would honestly, truly stab numerous children/babies in their faces to even be outside the RDS right now, hearing the music didn’t cause me that awful, awful pang that I’ve been feeling all day.
Both today and Yesterday* I’ve been looking through a haze of combined bereavement and nausea, as in earlier I was trying to lobotomize myself and everyone around me if I saw a picture, heard an ad or received ANOTHER text/call from my dad saying:
“OMG OUR HOTEL SHARES A WALL WITH THE RDS AND WE CAN HERE HIM TALKING AND SINGING PENNY LANE DURING THE SOUNDCHECK YAYYYYY!”.
Thanks. I’ll just go back to obsessively making Mop Top biscuits and torturing myself with the setlist like a fucking masochist.
But really the sound of..is there a word? HIS VOICE made me happy mainly because I became, in some way, happy for the people who were there, not just my parent (disowning my mother after this ofc) and their friends, but the whole audience. Because really; as many people as possible need to experience this. And I KNOW how cheesy and oh so martyr-ish that sounds, and the only way I can describe it really is through the words of Lennon/McCartney** themselves: “There’s nowhere you can be that’s not where you’re meant to be.”
I mean, it blows my mind to think that those four people were ever even alive, plus that I can hear their voices and innermost thoughts any time I want..but the fact that I literally witnessed this..force that’s existed and lived and BEEN through history and in every chapter of my own life is utterly, utterly, utterly surreal.
I was just SEVENTEEEN* for god’s sake, and I somehow got to witness unique emotion and genuine humour and intense talent and intense passion during some three and a half privileged hours. He actually spoke to us. I don’t think thats something I’ll ever be able to take in or comprehend. I don't want to write a post on that night though, because it feels too..personal?
Anyway I genuinely think that some experiences and emotions surpass plain, written words.
GODDD WHAT A DAY. What a lot of capitals. :-S
I’m off to empty my stomach contents onto the couch kthnxbye.
♥♥♥
* ha. Its humorous cause that’s a song he wrote. And sang. To me.
** HOLYFUCK I SAW ONE HALF OF LENNON/MCCARTNEY
But really the sound of..is there a word? HIS VOICE made me happy mainly because I became, in some way, happy for the people who were there, not just my parent (disowning my mother after this ofc) and their friends, but the whole audience. Because really; as many people as possible need to experience this. And I KNOW how cheesy and oh so martyr-ish that sounds, and the only way I can describe it really is through the words of Lennon/McCartney** themselves: “There’s nowhere you can be that’s not where you’re meant to be.”
I mean, it blows my mind to think that those four people were ever even alive, plus that I can hear their voices and innermost thoughts any time I want..but the fact that I literally witnessed this..force that’s existed and lived and BEEN through history and in every chapter of my own life is utterly, utterly, utterly surreal.
I was just SEVENTEEEN* for god’s sake, and I somehow got to witness unique emotion and genuine humour and intense talent and intense passion during some three and a half privileged hours. He actually spoke to us. I don’t think thats something I’ll ever be able to take in or comprehend. I don't want to write a post on that night though, because it feels too..personal?
Anyway I genuinely think that some experiences and emotions surpass plain, written words.
GODDD WHAT A DAY. What a lot of capitals. :-S
I’m off to empty my stomach contents onto the couch kthnxbye.
♥♥♥
* ha. Its humorous cause that’s a song he wrote. And sang. To me.
** HOLYFUCK I SAW ONE HALF OF LENNON/MCCARTNEY
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